Just about life

Do you know what the feeling is when people broke an appointment at last minute? After you had prepared everything including yourself? Broke an appointment was not the issue I concerning to but at least try to not make it at last minute. Broke an appointment for a guy who always broken your heart was made me unbearable. Maybe I’m not in love, I’m not you. Thus, I do not understand why girls always blame themselves for guy's mistake and never learnt to treat self better. He does not deserve your tears. He still can make fun around with friends, sleep tight and eat something nice when you are suffocating alone. What is the point to suffering yourself for nothing? That's really ridiculous. He just prefers who easy come easy go. Don't treat yourself as a girl like that.

Girl, actually you can always be happy with your life, free to make any decision, proud with yourself. Just depend on how you think and what you choose in life. But now, what are you doing? Crying for a stupid fellla? Tell you what, I will straight away dumping the bastard into rubbish bin if I’m yours. We have brain, we have knowledge, and we have our own ability. Why we need to depend on guy for everything, especially an asshole? We can create a lot of possible instead of waiting someone to create a land to us! Whose will know whether the land is suit to us? Possibly, the land will belong to another girl later?

Anyway, I didn't change my plan yesterday even though you had broke an appointment with me. I went to Mid-Valley and met with Jaslyn since I had never met with her after last year Dec. She changed a lot compare with last year. Don't you think so? Looks better than previous who always wear a big size T-Shirt and 3 quarter pant to school. I was forcing her to take some picture with me so that I can update my blog. Camwhore here^^ but I did not satisfied with myself here. Looks suck.. Is time to salon...

Window shopping? Nah~It's impossible happen on me!!! 4 items I bought yesterday at Sasa. Just four items but costed me amount RM238.oo after 20% discount >.< comestic really cost women a burden T_T

Yesterday was my youngest broth Jack’s birthday.
Happy B’day to my lovely broth!
May all dreams come true!

MY DATE?

After cutting the cake, I went out with my friend for his dinner, my supper around 9.30pm. We had talked a lot with past. We were together laughing so hard due to our stupidity from the past and also, even the present, now. We just like to foolish people around and ourselves sometimes. Everything was so nice until he was kissing my cheek without my notice and holding my hand without permit. What would a girl do in this situation? Slap his face straight away? Run away from the first place happens? Crying? Embarrassing? But I didn’t. I not even felt angry with it but it was enough to make me calm down emotional difficultly afterward.

I really couldn’t understand. How could you confess to me while you still have a girlfriend? Maybe lonely will kill a person and made you having some wrong illussion on me. and it might be the reason too why I didn't slap you for the kiss on cheek. Honestly your hug was warm enough to take away the cold but there's no more further, shouldn't have any further. Full stop been puting. Lonely is not the reason to make sin or do watever you want, or what I want. My mind is still conscious and no more blind. You were never giving up on me no matter how many times I was rejected & explained with my situation. Sometimes, I really do feel pity for your girlfriend. I’m not going to become another one of her. I need fidelity. You can say that I’m too defensing myself but there’s nothing wrong to defense myself from being hurting. You said I cheating myself, cheating my own feeling just because I’m scare. That’s why I’m not even daring to look into your eyes to answer your question. This will be my last time clarify with you at here and hope you will understand cause I really appreciating you as my friend. I never cheating myself and I couldn’t cheating myself too. My rejection is doesn’t matter with your girlfriend but is me. I really waiting for someone meanwhile work hard to fight for my own future now. I have many dreams and goals need to pursue. Now is the time to start implement. I have to restructure my life to be better of me. Tough, confidence, smart, and independent!

Just you are not the one I waiting for.

treat her and yourself better k?

MY INTERNSHIP?

There’s just another 2 weeks for my internship in G2. Within the past 12 weeks, I gained a lot, especially with my EQ management and the attitude on our responsibility. My supervisor praises me on last week with my good job! I feel happy and worth with my effort. The most important is they appreciate your effort too. Anyway, my supervisor hope that I can learnt and absorb as much as possible within my last 10days. At least I can leave with proud at the end of day.

My WILD

Now is 2.27am, Sunday morning. I still sit in front of my lovely lappie, listening to some rock-and-roll music, and writing my diary. There would be perfect with a glass of red wine but not. I just came back from my cousin house for a dinner at Banting, Selangor. Felling dizzy with few bottles of beer. As what I had expected, dressed up myself with a sexy hot pant and a deep V clothes has successes to make those guys fix their eyes on me. (That was what my dad suggested, hot pant and a black color deep V clothes can make me looks gorgeous and slim. Dad, you are right! It was.) Men are vision animal definitely. They were keeping their eyes on me whenever and wherever I moved but no dare to over the border line. I was Bending my waist, changing my sitting position, walking around with my sexy high-heel shoe...Guys, are you thirsty? Opss..So sorry..My aunty always teach us to fully utilise our body language as a weapon. Shows them without shy and proud with it. Just let them look at it but couldn't touch! Aunty, I did it pretty well as you did. It was totally fulfilling my peacockery with my little naughty. Am i very superficial? Yes!!! I was! Whose care about it? I don't mind what you have thought on me...As long as the attraction still together with me and make me happy and proud... There's another evil living inside my soul which just been inhibition.

There were some guys confess to me currently. Feel peacock yet a bit annoying sometimes. "I Love You" speak out from their mouth doesn't lead me high as what movie or drama does describe. I felt empty as my heart still pumping ordinary, my soul staying peaceful. But thanks to love me anyway, for everything. Your persist is what I never have. Life doesn't comes perfect! The one came to you was not the one you expecting. I really do hope that you are the one confess to me, not them. I had confessed everything to you as my naked...Thus, can you say something instead of pretending nothing? Feeling is just something that couldn't control by self no matter how many times I had asked myself to give up on you and forgot about the past that you did for me. Nevertheless, it keeps replaying in my mind as I trying hard to forget it. How many days didn't hear your voice? 2 days? 3 days? Or 4? Do you thinking of me as what I always do? Please hold me tight before I have gone once day.

Jealousy

Do you still remember what I had shared with yours on my last post? About one of my friend's who asked me to brisbane, Aus together on the coming april? Well, who dislike travel? who never dreams of travelling to somewhere out of Asia countries...but am i affortable with the expenses? of course not! I don't wanna be broke after back from Aus. My friend's Alvin, he never think of budget and nothing to think about too. He working for airlines as a plane mechanical engineering in Singapore. The only benefit working in airlines that make me jealous is....

"You can fly for free whenever & wherever you want!"

Man~ I really jealous lo..

Fly for free to Aus, after that stay for free at Melvin's house! He really did plan everything well within the budget included ya.. no matter how..he won't die of hunger or homeless at there. OK. At least he still gave me an idea to work for Airlines next time. As considering, I might apply airlines company for marketing dept which used to organise campaign to promote their services. erM... dreams here again..... eh..How do I enter airlines company???

NO TITLE as my life now...

Some of friends complaint that i didn't update my blog for long. Sorry darling, I really feel moody on last whole week. My work doesn't go smooth. Tired of physically can be recharge with a short rest, but mentally is more harder to heals. I tried to apply the law of attraction on mine, tried to brighten up myself with a lot of encouragement, tried to thinking positively to make life easier but it's fail. Always asking myself, why I couldn't be smart and better? because my effort is just not enough? maybe.. not much of interesting things was happen in my life currently....

I just went to matta fair on this afternoon with my dear's Pui San. she went to book a trip to Hong kong on coming Jun. I hope can follow too but unfortunately couldn't. There's another new sem on Jun and I think I wil start busy for my FYP(Final year proporsal). Another friend invite me to Brisbans on coming april too but ..... haiz... i guess i will just stay at home for coming holidays... be a good girl and save money. Promise myself! must plan a trip on Dec as a present for my graduated! pamper myself at least once!

No plan to update my blog until I had received this home make cookies from Pui San....Girl, I really do appreciated every little thing that u did for me. Feel touching here.... Thanks ya.. It taste great! really....The one who never ever cook water before can made such good cookies nowadays.. admire you! wat Melvin said is right...nothing is impossible if you are really work hard for it and start by now!

Another presents from my company.. nothing special to talk about.. but i like those visual..especially the lips with chilli....

That's all for last week.... hope can share more with yours next time..!!

My B'day

Hey~ 8 of march is my big day! waiting my friends at Neway Time Square.

but waiting is quite bored. let's play v my camera before they come^^

This year we made something different. No more cake for birthday but with J&CO donut^^
1st wish..I wish to.............
(1st wish is a secret...)

2nd wish is for our ever lasting friendship.

Our only "Reunion Picture" after few years...
(We Knew each others during Form2..a lot of memories in my mind..)

My Buddy's Stephanie & Me.
(She look great! Stephanie, treat yourself better ok? Your birthday is coming NEXT!! kacha!!)

My buddy's MM & Gah Hui
(They are always the same without change XD)

Stephanie again & MM ^^
(different style... casual & lady)


"Ji Mui", really paisei today.. u paid all for me..the karaoke fee, donut, & my presents..
(Skin Food Fresh Lime Body Emulsion and comestic pen.)

Besides, thx for spent ur's time on me...and everything that u did.

I felt touching too when you all singing d birthday song v different language ya..
haha.. but need more practise anyway~!!
feel happy v you all arounds..
this's friends about..


p/s: Thanks for some other friends who blessing for me too.
Jasmine, Li Ling, Kah Yin, Kelvin Lee, W.P.Yeoh, Dennis Bain, Angel, Karen Lee, Wei Xiong, Tracy, Keith, Hui Chi San, Pui San, Seok Yong, Wei Xiang, Darren Kailun, Xiao Yee, Pei Wei, Jin Suan, Jamie, Kurt, Grace Poh, Mei Sim, Sook Funn, Erng Mei, Ryan, Cherrie, Jeff Chiew, Paul Chong, Norman Law, Pei chyi, Levi, Alan, Joanne etc..
(Sorry if miss up somebody...anyway, I had received ur blessing..)

Thanks for your Present....

Rong Hee荣希, I had received your birthday present.. This was the 1st present that I had received this year. Thanks a lot...I will keep it well ^^

I LOVE IT SO MUCH!

Another present from my Associate Director. A limited edition Dunhill's metal pack. The most special is... The metal pack got my name on top. ^^ I can keep it as memories..

Chit Chat!

Felt great yesterday to hang out with my Jasmine & Li ling. We were sing karaoke together from 1pm - 6.30pm. we shout together without shame. This's another way to release our stress ^^ after that, we just had some drink together and chit chat about life, about work, about properties, about travelling & of course about guys too... We have plan to organise a bag packing on the coming may but still decide for the destiny. hope can make it this time...

Today just went back to general hospital for my medical check up in half a year. Good that everything's fine with my report. But my Doc gave me a lot of antibiotic for next 2 months.. my body is quite weak currently. besides. he said that this antibiotic is good for skin.. got a lot of pimples on face..ugly...

we always chit chat a bit when I was back to hospital. He suggest me to married after graduated since a lot of Doc still single and available such as Specialist Doc. Chang & Doc.Lim ^^ both of them are really MAN~ & smart!! no doubt.... i knew them almost 5 years since i was stay in Hosp last time..... hehehee..